Mister Mohamad has been a fixture on Baltimore Street near the parking garage on Commerce Street for at least three years. Of all of the homeless panhandlers in the area, where Niki and other lady office workers have to take center in rugby formation ringed by their male coworkers to avoid being mugged at lunch time, Mister Mohamad has a chivalrous code of sorts. Standing well over six feet and of a thin, wiry frame, Mister Mohamed is padded out with many clothes and a thick jacket, missing his front teeth, but nevertheless has status among the ghost folk fleeing to and fro from their towering office buildings and the parking garage among the rabid press of scrounging, begging, threatening and even attacking nutcases, addicts and fiends.

What sets this man apart is he greets all ghost people with a “God Bress” wishes them a good day, offers to carry the lady’s bags, shoos off those of a more feral ilk who would threaten them and only asks for handouts from well-heeled men as a way of funding his protective services. There is even a legendary tale of Mister Mohamed flying to the rescue of fine ghost lady fleeing from ravenous fiends and escorting her back into her office building.

Well, in the later days of 2017, a Latino man with a South Baltimore address died from the blunt force head trauma he suffered late one night in a drunken brawl on Baltimore Street, which, by night is the center of vice in Harm City, where drugs are openly sold and used in front of police who escort strippers from their meat market places of nude business to the parking garage overlooking Mister Mohamad’s concrete post. Mister Mohamad was taken in on manslaughter charges.

Niki, a woman who has enjoyed his protection a few times when her phalanx of male coworkers were not available, had this to say about his triumphant return to Baltimore Street:

“Mister Mohamed is back, he’s like celebrity, standing on the street corner waving and saying, “God Bress,” and everybody is hi-fiving and waving and welcoming him back. I mean, he was like the best homeless dude on the planet, never hurt anyone and we missed him. He was the pillar of his community. To me he seems huge but the men say he is skinny under all those clothes. In any case, he was acquitted because a bystander came forward with video of the incident and testimony that he was defending himself against these Mexican dudes.

Note that a native Baltimorean was attacked by three immigrants [legal or illegal is unknown] and when he successfully derailed the attack by knocking one of the fat heads THE FUCK OUT he became a criminal. If that man with a conscience had not been leaving the Hustler Club and videoed the event and offered testimony in court this would have gone down in legal history as a one-on-one mutual combat in which one man tragically died, rather than a defense against a pack attack. For the police and the entire legal system support the mob against the individual, the criminal against the non-criminal and the immigrant over the native.

Personally, If Trump builds his wall on the Rio Grande, I hope they raise a statue of Mister Mohamed standing sentinel in full funk, a dented, shock-headed pumpkin head at his feet.