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BPD is Underreporting Homicides, Says BPD Officer

What's up with the abrupt halt in Harm City homicides?

"Please, Yo, say it ain't so!"

This past Friday, after Uber Joe dropped me off in York Pennsylvania and I walked into a local bar hauling a tactical pack, a former military man expressed some interest in me. The man is a law officer from Baltimore City, who lives in Pennsylvania, knowing well that the Baltimore City Government is on the side of violent crime and that no BPD officer or his family is safe residing in Harm City.

As we began discussing the murder map used by the Baltimore Sun, a template which has been updated daily [instead of the previous every other day] this year, and which has had most of its statistical functions disabled, I mentioned that I have seen in November and December, two homicides come off and the count reduced by 1 each time, as if Lazarus had been shot and raised.

This BPD officer told me flatly—and reminded me that I had not heard to from him—that the Baltimore City Police Department was suppressing homicide reports of some individuals who later died in hospital and that the only cases in which the homicide is to be reported for what they are are those in which the victim is deceased at the scene or in high profile cases like the stabbing of the Harford County woman on Shanksgiving night.

This brought to mind the incident about a month ago when the Mayor was asked about a double shooting at a news conference and she replied that no one was dead, and the dudes died later in the hospital. It seems the matriarch might have let the secret slip a bit.

Also, not only are Baltimore homicides likely to be under reported by about 10, but that Baltimore City is misreporting its number of vacant houses by over 10,000. The absentee owners and absconded renters are still being listed as Baltimore Citizens, with the population of Baltimore now clearly below 600,000 [probably about 585,000] while it is being reported as high as 613,000.

In the Land of the Lie, in the Age of Adlib Media Myth, where lies crystalize like purified snowflakes in the TV ether to be imbibed as the Once and Future Truth, no city stands as a starker testament to the Lie as the very axis of post-cultural humanity, as the font of our Nation and Sacred Wellspring of our Time than does Harm City.

But despite all of this collusion to misrepresent the Truth, the guardians of truth in Baltimore, the Harm City Hoodrats, who shoot the head with large caliber handguns from under 5 feet, have insured that this year's finish will be no Black Sox debacle, but a fourth year in a row as Middleweight Murderbowl Champions.

"Say it ain't so, Yo?"

"It ain't, don't ya know—da poleese be a lyin' like da dogz dey iz!"

The Violence Project

An Omnibus Volume of James' First Two Books

Nice Day for a Funeral

Add Comment
ShepDecember 31, 2018 11:41 PM UTC

If a drive-by shooting of a house or vehicle creates no casualties, there are PD's who will code the event as a Vandalism. The same code as a dented garbage can.

Or so I'm told.
Bryce SharperDecember 31, 2018 9:51 PM UTC

Are you saying that homicides are under-reported by a factor of 10 so that we should multiply the number reported by 10?
responds:January 1, 2019 1:26 PM UTC

Noooooo, It seems that between 5 and 10 killings have been reassigned. I know of 5 that were fudged and my interviewee convinced me that they were not all.
WellRead EdDecember 31, 2018 4:59 PM UTC

Working in the ER of a North Dindustan hospital during a particularly violent Summer, we were informed that should the victim of a shooting or stabbing die in the ER, the cause of death should be "Cardiac Arrest". Technically true since, if one loses enough blood or there is enough trauma to the heart, the heart will stop. This was requested because the city's crime stats were approaching low Earth orbit in numbers, and they wanted to preserve the city's image (A statement that evoked open laughter). However, the doctors (rightfully) told administration to pound sand.