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‘Sweating It on the Side of the Road’
Squashing Cops with Thomas in a 16-Ton Mack Truck
“This was a few years back when I was driving for the furniture company. I drove a twenty-six-thousand-pound, straight, Mack truck, with an over cab—so the engine was not sticking out front. I was driving in the face of the truck like a bus. One more pound and I would have needed a CDL license. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a big truck, and was loaded with about sixteen-thousand pounds worth of furniture.
“This was down in Anne Arundel County and it was raining terribly. I was behind an unmarked cop car, with two plain clothes cops in the front seat, and some guy in the back seat. The car had Virginia plates. These were Virginia cops. He had two cars in front of him that had their turn signals on and he was giving them space. I gave him fifty yards. We were doing forty. The rain was coming down so hard it was difficult to see. The road was also in bad condition, and had these divots in it filled with water.
“Well, I thought he was going through the yellow light. Cops always take the yellow light. But he stops. I put on the air brake and nothing. If it was dry, no problem. I look to the right—trees. I look to the left, cars. I hit the horn and the guy in the back seat looks up at me with the biggest eyes. He was in shock. I rammed him right through the intersection. The entire back of the car was an accordion, all the way up to the back window, which just folded.
“I was terrified. The funny thing is, we had a flat counter between the seats were we set our drinks. Mine didn’t even spill. We hardly felt a thing. The guy in the back seat is fine. The driver folded up the wheel, bent it forward in a U. The passenger was banged up, he’s on his phone calling, cops are coming, and coming, and coming, ambulances, a tow truck. The entire time I’m sweating it on the side of the road, in the rain, my hood up, standing there waiting to be charged.
“My helper, he had a bench warrant out for his arrest. So he calls up his girl and she comes and picks him up while the cops are there. Not a single cop said anything to me.
“The passenger goes off in an ambulance.
“The driver, he was in bad shape. They strap him into another ambulance.
“The guy in the back seat, he drives off in the back of another un-marked car—no handcuffs. He didn’t try to run.
“They crack the trunk and take away the guns.
“More cops leave, not a one of them having asked or said a thing. I did not even have to present my license.
“The car is towed, and the rest of the cops leave, and there I am standing on the side of the road.
“I didn’t realize how bad the truck was because it was raining. I drove home. Then when I drove back into work the next day it started to overheat. The radiator had been blown, but the rain kept the engine cool.
“A few months later we get a call from the Anne Arundel County police, and they want to know what truck it was, what driver it was, and want our information. We didn’t know anything—nothing. No detectives every came to the store.
“I have no idea what that was about. Were they drunk? Were they doing something they weren’t supposed to do? Was it witness protection, an extradition? All I know is that I’ve never been so scared and never got so lucky.”
-Thomas
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