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▶  More from Modern Combat Guest Authors The Man Cave To The Point
A Shocking Thought
By Professor X

Professor X does not support assassination of people he does not like, preferring to resort to the weapons of hard logic and reason to deal with his foes. But I know that many out there see violence as golden, the ultimate solution to problems because the only knock-down argument is to physically knock your opponent down; as Jack Donovan put it, against eggheads like me: “It’s time to quit worrying and learn to love the battle axe. History teaches us that if we don’t, someone else will.” See:

Perhaps the Donovan philosophy lies behind claims by Fox News host Kimberly Guilfoyle that the US Secret Service should “kill” Snoop Dogg and Bow Wow, for their threats to Trump and his family:

Professor X does not support needless cruelty to dumb animals in any way. Dogs need to be treated humanely and will surely be content being placed in kennels with adequate water and dog biscuits. Removal of their testicles often helps in behavioral control, preventing male dogs fighting, mounting other male dogs and engaging in needless masturbation. If dogs held in captivity step out of line, cattle prods can be highly effective in correcting behavior, especially if inserted gently in the anal orifice:

Professor, thank you. I now want to fence with cattle prods. I have a reason to live once again!

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Add Comment
IshmaelMarch 19, 2017 1:20 PM UTC

Ok James, cattle prods it is, set you up this fall, hope you find someone to fence with you, I will sell tickets to the event!
responds:March 20, 2017 10:22 AM UTC

I'll fence with one of the young raves of your tribe—will have the fencing masks shipped out ahead of time.