Click to Subscribe
▶  More from Harm City
Baltimore Link
Mass Transit in the Land of Delusion: 6/19/17

On 6/18 a long ballyhooed restructuring of the mass transit system in Greater Baltimore was initiated. It has been stated from the beginning, that the purpose behind this Baltimore Link system was to provide greater service for current mass transit users and to encourage motorists, visitors and tourists to enjoy a modernized and more user-friendly transit experience.

Knowing that bus patronage has fallen off massively, beginning precisely in the last week of April 2015, particularly at night, in favor of far more expensive but safer and more convenient Uber, Lyft, Sedan and cab service and even the use of hackers, or gypsy cab drivers, the redesign of the system was and is obviously a result of these forms of individual conveyance taking a bite out of the mass transit lines passenger pool. However, it seems that the people reworking the system thought this fall off in patronage was a result of direct competition, that Uber and Lyft were just taking mass transit customers via the direct appeal of a more convenient service. They did not consider that people chose a huge, ten-fold, increase in expense for travel for safety’s sake, not convenience. This assumption was probably abetted by false reporting, under reporting and juking of violent crime numbers. This is, after all, a State, not a municipal, project.

So, on Monday night, half wondering if I would have to walk all the way to work, as I assumed, in response to the massive fall off of nighttime bus patronage on the lines I use, that nighttime hours and lines would be scaled back, I was instead treated to a mass transit dream. The gaudy extent of the new mass transit system in the four sectors I used it last night was, in relation to the demand for night time mass transit, akin to Willie Wonka’s Chocolate Factory in relation to the standard demands for sweet stuffs in ghetto dime stores of the day.

Where three bus lines once lazily converged at long intervals, five bus lines now loop on the same transit hub, with three of these being short runs. Traditionally, Baltimore bus routes have been flawed by their great length, keeping a commuter tucked on one bus for up to two hours. Yes, this was often an inconvenience and meant that missing a bus was a disaster. However, these short run buses were all nearly empty.

Why are they empty?

Why won’t this new scheme bring patrons back from Uber and Lyft?

Because bus travel in Baltimore, while becoming more convenient and offering better access and latter hours of operation to those who do not fear attack [groups of thugs], this addition of time spent on stops away from the safety of the bus, will put prey humans at greater risk. Being mugged, mobbed or murdered while using mass transit in the Greater Baltimore Metropolitan Area has now become three times more efficient!

I can’t wait.

I can go into work later now, can even go out and ride around on 24-hour bus lines—which never before existed in Baltimore—and collect even more great stories about the Fall of Civilization, here, on the cutting edge of societal devolution, in Harm City!

“Oh, what a wonder feeling,

Oh, what a wonderful day,

I have a sneaking suspicion

That some bad shit is rolling my way!”

-From the Soundtrack to Thuglahomo

The Hunt for Whitey

Recognizing and Surviving the Condition of Anarcho-Tyranny

Add Comment
MockingbirdJune 22, 2017 11:45 PM UTC

For God's sake man, be careful out there! You're my only source of postmodern zombie city news on the East Coast...