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The Cuck Song
By Ivarr the Boner


Professor dy/dx, no doubt a mathematician, named after the differential calculus, published in these non-pc pages a slap-in-the-face piece to the song “Despacito,” the number 1 song everywhere. “Despacito” even though it has lots of Latin sweat, big ass shaking and titties being fondled, still is about girl worship, and only differs by degree from a 1960s song like “I Want to Hold Your Hand” (1964), Lennon/McCartney. Nowadays, the Cuck, who may even be a scoring alpha, wants to hold her mucus bits, but only “Slowly”:

“Slowly

I want to undress you with kisses slowly

Sign the walls of your labrynth [sic: “labyrinth]

And make your whole body a manuscript.”

What the fuck? A “manuscript” – are we at university or on the Third World streets? If you keep warm having a fire in a 44-gallon drum, you burn manuscripts, or even newspaper. And, if you are a hot-blooded Latin type, you should have spurted your jungle juice in the ho, long before this. Too much talk and not enough action, I think. One more breath and this could be the result:

http://www.eatliver.com/insane-fashion/

perhaps because of mercury pollution:

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2010/12/101203-homosexual-birds-mercury-science/

let alone this:

https://www.thestarchronicle.com/2017/07/10/two-american-man-beats-muslim-refugee-death-raping-13-years-old-girl-support/

As well, all of this sort of mush appears in literature too, especially the poetry of Romanticism, Blake, Wordsworth, Coleridge, Keats etc., which is one of the dangers of putting primacy of emotion (women), over reason (masculinity). I want to rage against all of this, in the name of neo-barbarianism.

Anyway, here is my satire of these Princess songs. I wrote this in my head, while dragging rubbish in a wheelbarrow up a hillside track, 600 meters, dumping it over the fuckhead neighbor’s fence, and then walking back. Total time to compose the song and music video and write it down, less than half an hour. Of course, this is dog shit, but better than the standard puke, selling billions, and with a message, too. But, we will never see the song and video produced. I also composed music for it later in the day, but being musically self-taught, I don’t know the notation, so can’t write it down. Anyway, I have worked in allusions to many pop love songs, hopefully reducing them to absurdity, which is what they are, yet compost producers get billions from pumping out this sewage.

[Song lyrics in lower case, music video instructions in capitals.]

JUST TO BE YOUR MAN

(The Cucked Song)

I wanna be your beta man, baby

Johnno Lennon and Peter Pan

Do all that I can, baby

Just to be Your man…

I wanna work all night, and all day, baby

To give you all my pay

And, hope that you will stay, baby

Just to be Your man…

CHORUS:

Just to be Your man…

Just to be Your man…

Just to be Your man….

OOOOOOOOOOOOh, baby, baby, baby…

Just to be Your Man… [INSTRUMENTAL]

[MUSIC VIDEO: WHILE THE FUCK CUCK SINGS THIS, FIRST IMAGE IS OF HIM WORKING IN FACTORY POURING MOLTEN METAL. SCENE CHANGE TO “PRINCESS’ GETTING READY TO GO OUT, THEN GOING TO A BAR, DANCING WITH A BIG BLACK STUD, SEE-THROUGH TOP. SCENE SWITCHES BACK TO CUCK BEING ROASTED IN AN INDUSTRIAL ACCIDENT, BUT THEN MIRACULOUSLY, SURVIVING GOING TO AN ATM TO GET A BAG OF MONEY. SCENE CHANGE TO PRINCESS RIDING BIG BLACK STUD, GRUNTING LIKE A PIG IN HEAT. SCENE CHANGE TO CUCK ON BENDED KNEE GIVING PRINCESS THE BAG OF CASH, HER TAKING IT, SLAMMING THE DOOR ON HIM. HE FALLS TO THE GROUND, KISSING THE SPOT WHERE SHE STOOD. SCENE CHANGE TO PRINCESS SPENDING THE MONEY. SCENE CHANGE AGAIN AS SONG ENTERS NEXT VERSE, DETAILED BELOW]

I wanna be Your white knight, baby

To serve you day and night, baby

To shine on your path, my light, baby

To put my super dude cape over every puddle

To save you from every trouble…

There will be no more faithful slave

Working, bound in servitude to the grave

Who will fight every knave…

I wanna see you smile, baby

If only for a while, baby

And to hold your hand, baby

and worship the ground where you stand…

CHORUS

[THE VIDEO NOW FEATURES NEWS FOOTAGE FROM WARS, MEN DYING AND BEING BLOWN APART, ATOMIC BOMBS EXPLODING. THEN REPEAT PREVIOUS FOOTAGE OF THE PRINCESS FUCKING AND THE CUCK DELIVERING THE MONEY.]

I wanna bring you songs and prose, baby

and a love as sweet as a rose, baby

but for the gentle touch of your lips

and to see the graceful sway of your hips

I wanna “re-align” for you, baby

if surgery is what you want me to do

‘cause it is all just social glue

and like Caitlyn, I’ll be just like new

I am unworthy to breathe

or touch your priestly sleeve

but if you should ever leave

I would surely bereave…

I am but a worm

Not even a sperm

You are a goddess, pure and divine

Beauty rich beyond time

While I am mere pond slime

CHORUS

[WHILE THE ABOVE SHIT IS BEING MOUTHED, THERE IS FOOTAGE OF HOMELESS MEN SLEEPING ON COLD US STREETS, IMAGES FROM DETROIT AND BALTIMORE, OF SLUMS, ABANDONED FACTORIES THAT HAVE FALLEN INTO UTTER RUIN, FOLLOWED BY IMAGES THEN OF NEW YORK FASHION SHOPS, COSMETICS AND OTHER GIRL-CONSUMER BULLSHIT. SCENE SWITCHES TO THE PRINCESS DANCING IN A LESBIAN BAR WITH VARIOUS LADIES, BOOBS EVERYWHERE, ALMOST A SAFETY HAZARD, THEN SCENE CHANGES TO A LESBIAN ORGY WITH PRINCESS IN DOMINANT ROLE. REPEAT PREVOUS SCENE OF CUCK GIVING HER THE MONEY, FOR THE FINAL TIME.]

If you think that this shit is over the top

then you had better put down your mop

and get out your Bowie to clear the slop

from your girl-glazed, star-filled eyes

and tighten your sphincter, ready for a surprise

‘cause the pill for men is bitter and blue

and this is THEIR fate for you

and you know it is all fuckin,’ fuckin’ true…

CHORUS: lyric changes to

Just to be A man…

Just to be A man…

Just to be A man… [Instrumental to fade]

[MUSIC VIDEO: IMAGES OF WARRIORS FROM THE EARLIEST TIME, STONE AGE, IRON AGE, ANCIENT GREECE, ROME, VIKINGS, MEDIEVAL WARS, ZULU FIGHTERS, SAMURAI, ANCIENT CHINESE WARRIORS WITH WAR SWORDS, ANZAC SOLDIERS CHARGING MACHINE GUN POSTS, FINAL IMAGE OF THE SIX US MARINES RAISING A FLAG ATOP MOUNT SURIBACHI, DURING THE BATTLE OF IWO JIMA. FADE TO DARK.]

Add Comment
Ruben ChandlerJuly 21, 2017 3:57 PM UTC

That's tight!