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Rat Beard
A Man Gear #2 Anectdote

Last night I had company on the bus. Over halfway through the trip, two Walmart employees, from their closing shift got on at Golden Ring, a thin, exhausted teenage boy who dragged himself to the back decks and fell asleep across the seat back in front of him, and a good looking, conservatively dressed, fully buttoned, natural hair wearing girl of 18 or 19. By the social standards of her population she is a virtual nun, that polo shirt button all the way to the neck, her nice C-cups hidden behind smock. She immediately scanned the bus and decided to sit next to White Daddy, as he already fast asleep coworker would provide little or no protection.

She never said a word and did nothing to draw my attention. However, it is normal for female blacks to sit as far away from white men as possible on the bus, particularly scruffy looking mugs like me. they normally sit near the men of their race to be worshipped in crudely profane, ways, the proxy sex goddess of an almost entirely pornographic culture.

This girl is an outlier.

I mentally extend my boundaries around her, which means I will only protect her from touch, not words. Hoodrats could scream at her and threaten to kill her and I would do nothing. But I will not let anyone touch her or take her things against her will. Further, I will keep this a secret, never looking at her, so as not to encourage her to become a power bitch.

For example, six months ago, I was stocking the sour cream section when a dindu couple came around the corner arguing and the man threatened to smack the woman, who was a rough sort and said to him, "You think you gonna hit me in font of What Man here?"

Trying to lighten the moment I raised my hands and shrugged, indicating to him that I wanted no trouble. He then said, "Shit, bitch, you tryin' to get pops here in trouble with this young buck?"

She then touched me affectionately on the shoulder, nodded to the knife sheath upside down in my front pocket and said, "Shit, nigga, Ma Main Man Here would fillet yo young dumb ass with dat nigg sticka on his hip!"

Trying to smooth it all out, I smiled kindly to her and said to him, "Dude, I can't help you out a this—you keep it up and she's gonna have half the Baltimore County Police piling up on you."

To that they both laughed and she said, "True dat, nigga," and strutted on.

Back to Miss Prim and Proper Walmart Clerk of the Month...

Rat Beard boards, a gang-tatted, dark-skinned, thug, with a long afro-snake beard braid on his chin, a half-smoked blunt behind his ear and a sly swagger to his menacing strut.

I instantly envision myself grabbing his beard braid with my left and "bilgeeing" his eyes [split spear hand].

He does not disappoint but starts in on her, rudly complimenting her and demanding conversation.

If she had insulted or argued with him I would have withdrawn my silent pact, rating her as a woman of the type described above. But she stayed silent, scrolling on her smart phone.

He then started grilling me with his eyes and I ignored him.

For the rest of the ride I constantly lopped a vision of me spearing his eyes and grabbing his beard in various attitudes of conflict.

When it came time for him to stop staring at her and for me to offload, I pretended to be in worse shape than I am [my hip and knee are killing me and I am using my cane for curbs.] trying to lore him off the bus into the big suburban empty. he doesn't tale the bait and they pull off.

That is LaFond the misanthrope in Man Gear #2

Of Lions and Men

Add Comment
LaManoAugust 1, 2017 9:49 AM UTC

Nothing misanthropic about the reaction or response to the Rat Beard or Whore Queen incidents; bang on the money both times.

It's HARD hard hard to keep your mouth shut and TRY not to "dispense justice" just from a sense of pride and rightness when you start hearing crap and insults directed to you or someone in your orbit. You'll end up in police trouble and won't be able to be there for the one where you're REALLY needed ....

I imagine that it's much easier to keep your mouth shut at the right time if you have the confidence that you could use your hands or umbrella or utility knife to handle the job that might need doing.

Being afraid that you CAN'T handle it makes it more likely that you'll do something stupid.