Click to Subscribe
▶  More from Harm City
The Incongruent Grocer
The Hipster Grocery Apocalypse is Nigh: 8/18/17

I enjoy Mister Mike's operation. I call it the Incongruent Grocer, because the entire staff on the front end is of the Hip Hop variety, in their early twenties. Most of the customers are also hip hopsters. But the music that plays overhead consists of classic rock and Motown!

You see, the two middle-aged women who run the place control the radio. So, as you enjoy a hip hop shopping experience, your soundtrack is of another era...

While visiting the local ghetto grocer, my former retail foe, who has inherited my overrun contract business, I was treated to more evidence, which has been coming in steady since June, that all major yogurt manufacturers have consistently overproduced top shelf yogurt—the stuff that goes for $1.50 to $4.99 a cup, for three months running. For a season of production, these companies, basing their production in previous sales and projected sales growth [usually 5%], have consistently over produced to the point where trailers of gourmet yogurt are being sold in ghettos at $.25 a cup!

What does it mean?

I do not know.

But I can hope that a hipster-yuppie population crash is occurring!

In the meantime, I can finally afford to maintain my digestive health in high style.

When Your Job Sucks

The Ghetto Grocer Kindle Edition

Add Comment
anonymousAugust 18, 2017 2:03 PM UTC

this all coming from the same soylent factory in the midwest for all North America, or are there regional variations?
LaManoAugust 18, 2017 11:57 AM UTC

Oh, the yogurt will be popular for the same reason that the HoHos and Doritos are popular.

You seen how many CALORIES are in "blended" yogurt? 190 calories in a 6 ounce cup - about like eating lard laced with sugar.

If it's got more than 80 calories per 6 oz., it's something besides yogurt and I don't bother at any price ....