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Saint Helena
A Dope-Drain Tale from 1980s Montana

Ron West commenting on Ruben's Our Bliss/Misery Complex

Ruben’s anecdote recalls a story of the time I was living in Helena, Montana in the eighties ... there was a bust ongoing (undercover police work) of the local petty weed dealers and one of them panicked, brought a half pound of super high-grade sensimilla to an acquaintance who didn't smoke dope but wasn't adverse to people who did, for safe keeping. But then, this dope-dealer skeedaddled town, no doubt due to the 'noids.' The guy holding his dope didn't want it but knew an artist who smoked and went to drop it at his house, the intended recipient wasn't home but the artists wife accepted the 'gift' and then something remarkable happened.

What the guy delivering the dope to his artist buddy didn’t realize was, the wife had had it up to her neck with her husband’s dope smoking, and his dope smoking buddies, because it was her attitude, now that they were married and had small kids, it was time to ‘get serious’ about life and stop with the dope-drain on their budget.

She put the half pound of sensimilla, together with a couple pounds of butter, into a large wok, simmered it for some hours at very low heat, strained the now green fat through cheese cloth and made up a VERY LARGE batch of VERY STRONG chocolate (to conceal any flavor of cannibis) brownies sans any evidence of dope (includes no leafy matter.) She then proceeded to send the brownies off to a large party attended by her husbands friends, where a local political wag was to announce the formation of Montana’s new “NO-NOTHING” (correct spelling, a deliberate gag on history) political party. The platform of the party was the Montana legislature meeting every two years for ninety days should be changed to meeting every ninety years for two days.

Everyone who attended that event was wrecked, for a week. And I mean wrecked. The party was on a Saturday night and it was Monday morning people showed up to work so dysfunctional, it defies description. One spent 40 minutes, panicked, looking for their car keys, which were clutched in their fist the entire time they were turning their house upside down, while looking for those very keys, in desperate search to get themselves off to work.

And, no, nothing, came of the nascent political endeavor, it was as if it had been little more than a passing hallucination. Pity, because it seemed (and seems) a good idea.

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Ruben ChandlerNovember 10, 2017 1:44 PM UTC

She made butter...................OMG!. I've accidentally been exposed to this recipe a few hundred times. Man, I swear I've stepped out my door and my feet actually rooted to the ground. I could see the roots growing. I couldn't walk. I could sway a little. Or walking down the hallway with my hands up against the wall, belaying my way to the bathroom. This is serious shit. Don't try this at home..............actually, ONLY try this at home. Here in Cali it's legal these days. Oddly, it's no longer as much fun for a lot of people. Now they are legalizing magic mushrooms. I have accidentally ingested these and will tell you, some other time, the wild tale of eating over 20 large caps and by large, I mean as big as a slice of bread, and going the whole Tibetan Book of the Dead route as illustrated by S. Clay Wilson. Great post.