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Weekend Home Invasion Fun
By Fred Beare

The ranch next door (one mile off) had a big music drug thing, bringing in city folk. It was action all night as I repelled all matter of scum wandering around, armed only with a Bowie knife and machete, and concealed Glock.

At 7.30 am I thought that it was all over, and went for my big morning shit. Splosh, a beauty. That’s when I heard them at the front door trying to break in. Good luck with that sine the steel door is bolted with five bolts from inside, the windows, all steeled up, etc. No time to wipe my smelly ass, just pants up, and grab the machete. But, the three home invaders heard me at the door, and by the time I had got the bolts undone, had too much of a lead for me. I am just too heavy for running now, but I could have shot them easily with the Glock. Come the end of the rule of law, that will all be in a day’s work.

Turd America

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