Dear James,

In one of your books - I believe it was in The Boned Zone - you mentioned that you kept an assortment of edged and blunt weapons in your bedroom to defend yourself in case of a break-in: sticks, knives, swords... and a meat hook.

I am very curious about this instrument and would like to know more about it's use in a life or death situation. I am thinking specifically :

- How do you hold it (lead or rear hand)?

- Is it sharp? Serrated? Or just pointy?

- Do you use it as a utility weapon to hook limbs, or do you go for a more lethal approach?

- What if the hook buries itself in a twerp's body? Wouldn't that hamper your flow/mobility in the thick of battle (pun intended)?

Thank you,

- Mike.

Mike, tragically I have yet to use a hook in battle.

I have used a meat hook in a supermarket and kept one in my room when I lived with Ron Bone in my late teens. Hooks hang conveniently and are easily accessible.

The hook I kept in my room on Caucasian Avenue, where I lived for 8 years, five of these under the protection of the blessed hook, was an old, rusted hay hook, similar to but longer than a cargo hook, which is about the length of a meat hook but not as sharp. This is the only hook I have trained with, doing shadow work in my room and hallway and also on my training post. I have since left this hook with Cory, the giant Nordic fighter of mine who has taken my old room. For, as you noted, a hook could hamper flow-mobility in combat, and that is what a giant like Cory wants, to be attached to his antagonist.

Based on the profile of those breaking and entering and home invading in Baltimore City, I figured to be heavier and stronger than my attackers. The hook is a big man’s weapon. I would not want to use it on Cory or his giant ilk.

I have practiced using it in two ways. Keep in mind that this hook has a 1 inch thick bar as long as the palm of a giant man’s hand is wide and that the 14 inch long ¼ inch thick bar protrudes between the two large fingers, ending in a pinky finger-sized wedge hook, that will go into a person. Also, this hook was—and based on Cory’s mind set—remains, rusty, which helps with the grip and may serve as a toxin to vex the fleeing home invader.

The Hook Alone

I prefer to hold this in my strong hand, with the hook facing away from my left and my opponent. I trained two combinations:

-a rising, forehand upper cut to the jaw to a descending backhand hook to his neck, using the left hand to disarm him or spear his eye socket as he is dragged down head first to reside under my boot heel.

-a powerful, overhand right to his temple/face, followed by a backhand hook of his back. Then pull back with the hook in the right hand and push with the left hand to send him out the window or down the stairs, as the hallway outside of my room was so configured.

The Hook Paired

Hold the hook in either hand, hook inward, paired with a stabbing blade held in the close guard. Backhand the twit in the face, then forehand hook and drag him into your waiting blade, Then push the hook hand to release and push-kick this bag of meat off of your blade and repeat on his partner until the hallway is cleared. As with many paired weapons it is necessary to change leads.

The sacred hook is pictured in this series of videos, as is the battlespace it was intended to be employed in, taken by my slave girl at the time, who has since slipped her fetters—Mike, do not starve your slave girls. Their wrists will shrink and they will slip away in the night!

And is now in the possession of the larger man in this machete duel, whom I also bequeathed my Viking sword.

Fighting Smart: Boxing, Agonistics & Survival