In an age where the following occurs, one might forgive us for seeking advice from another time...

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Shep

Great Khan,

Yesterday, I was riding my bike in the cul-de-sac with my children and 3 skinny yoof pulled into the driveway of our local drug salesman (of the same race). At the same moment, my wife walked around the corner near their house wearing tight yoga pants. I noticed the yoof looking at her and rode over there. People tell me I always look like I've been kicked in the shins and they saw this expression as I rode up. My wife could see them looking at her. I have great taste in women so I can't really expect men to avert their eyes.

My plan was to jump off my bike and manhandle anyone who said something to her, but - praise God! - no one did and so I'm not now in jail. Saying something to a man's woman is a serious escalation that demands a response.

Now that I've cooled-off, I realize it would've been better to stand on the public sidewalk and mad-dog whoever said anything to my wife and perhaps spit at his feet. By exchanging a provocation with another of my own without saying anything, I put the ball back in their court. My video cameras would catch one or, mostly likely all, of them assaulting me rather than the other way around.

In decades past, I would've been expected to fight anyone making a pass at my wife, black or white. Nowadays, honor is held in such low esteem that I am probably expected to pull down my pants and offer my ass as well as my woman to anyone who demands it.

I welcome your comments and reproofs, Great Khan!

-Bryce Sharper

“Wrong!!”

To fight for a woman is a good buck instinct in a brave, but not becoming the owner of a slave-girl, especially one you have honored as wife.

Your protective instinct is also proper in a primal way, but reflects the buck instinct of a newly blooded brave who has recently cleared the wall of an enemy stronghold with soft company hoisted over his broad shoulder.

As an established lord and owner of your own breeding stock, with whelps to prove your prowess, you have no reason to fight, as that would be a contest, and the “yoof” in question were not yet worthy of that elevating honor. To assign them that honor when they know in their own paltry hearts they are unworthy would reflect poorly upon Your Sharpness.

Also, an immediate, obvious move to protect, might betray a lack of confidence.

Hetman Sharper, your best policy here is to bestow your grace. Below is a suggested sequence, tactically modified to fit your sense of the situation:

Contrive a reason to get your progeny out of danger without betraying worry and also demonstrating your paternal benevolence, understanding that all of these “yoof” have secretly yearned for a father figure, “Time to get inside, Mom’s got dinner ready.”

As your children move to safety you move closer to the possible threat, doubling your masculine profile, protector and risk-taker.

This will put at least one of the “yoof” in mind of the low status of his own men, “Sheeid, dis nigga got hisself a fine bitch, who cook too—my Mamma send her manz down ta da conna stoe for skrimps when she hungray, en I neva get shit ta eat.”

You then, as you walk by towards your fine wife, placing yourself between the three bucks and your children, nod confidently towards them and elevate them at the same time by saying, “Hey man,” or some such pleasantry as you admire your property, subliminally stating with your air of confidence, “That’s right, Yo, if you survive your next run in with the Nortenos, you have a 5% non-cumulative chance [because your ass can’t multiply] of getting to my level and macking your own fine bitch—in the meantime, good luck. ”

Often, palefaces who own nice houses are seen by thug youth as weak and tied to that property. But, you have a chance here to share the status of your drug dealer neighbor. After all, Scarface had surveillance cameras and he was a real dude, right?

The important thing is that your words are sure and nonbelligerent, your eyes are on your prize and your body language presents a swag that does not humiliate or question, but leads into the future, offering some hope to your temporary understudies that they too might become the man they wish they had had for a father.

Don’t be like that asshole pro wrestler that challenged a pack of sketchy thugs for showing up in suburbia and got swarmed, but be the guy they wish they were. For that matter elevate your drug dealer—if he were to be visible at the time—neighbor by giving him some kind of passing nod of tolerance, as if he only sold dope on your block because you permitted it, which does have a kernel of truth to it, as you have already committed to not going to war with him over his illegal activities and have not called in the narcs. Your obvious knowledge of what is going on at your neighbor’s house can appear to have caused you to act in:

-1. Fear

-2. Approval

-3. Tolerant unconcern

Once you break down what perceptions are available to these three youthful possible threats to your family, then immediately find the kernel of truth which supports the most powerful perception [the fact that you have not called the narcs on this asshole neighbor to avoid a war on your home turf] and build on that by injecting it into your body language. As a guy who seems to carry a hard look of disapproval among reprobates and who has also had some training and fights, you need only tap into your last victory or improbable survival over a foe as you internalize the compliment to your taste in chattel offered by your young protégés in their quietly crude way as you ritually repossess her in whatever manner you see fit, calibrated to elicit a positive response from her. If these brutalized orphans see themselves as having earned your respect and she flashes you a smile, as they cruise down the road in ten minutes on their way to their next caper, one of them might just say what the rest are thinking, “One day, I’m gonna be a nigga like dat—lagit en shit, with a fine bitch heatin’ up my razbaray pop tarts in a brand new microwave!”

And with any luck, they all three get ventilated by pigs or competitors before it comes time for them to re-up their supply. If not, repeat masculine approval ritual as needed. Remember, once you have bestowed such tentative approval, if they breach honor and challenge you, remain silent until contact and then mechanically kill as if stepping on insects. You can never abide a challenge near your human property, but simply exterminate the transgressor. The Narco State does a lot to compromise the family, but does provide some venues for overt honor application.

Strength and Honor, Hetman Sharper

An Omnibus Volume of James' First Two Books

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