“What part of your life would you relive of you could—I mean, what was your happy time?”

-Sol

Sol, thanks for this unsettling question—they are the best kind.

Also, thanks for clarifying the question. I was going to answer the question psychopathically. If I was given a chance to relive a portion of my life, it would be the most terrible portion, which was my teen years, even more hellish than childhood as I discovered that adults were not only lying prison guards of the childhood soul but too stupid to contemplate much of anything. If I could relive a portion of my life it would be done with malice as I journeyed back into Time to become an unrepentant maniac, dedicated to terrorizing school teachers, football coaches, bullies and jocks. I should have done so many terrible things, but lacked the drive and focus, so enamored I was with reading…

As for the “Happy Time” of my life, that is very easy to answer, and no, I would not go back to it for it is the only portion of my life that was positive in the main. From age 40, in the winter of 2003, when my wife fired me, to late summer of 2006, when I sold my soul to a supermarket owner, I lived like a barbarian nomad, slept narry a wink, enjoying a greater variety and quality of frail companionship than the entire rest of my life combined and also fought some of the best stick-fighters in the world and established a network of fellow fighters that has sustained my knuckleheaded efforts to this day. During this period I was typically reading 25 books at a time on a stationary bike, finishing one or two per week, making this also my most enjoyable mental interlude in what has otherwise been a mostly unsavory life.

If I could go back in Time I would go back to year 13 and do one of the two options listed below, depending on how weak or strong I felt, for my life choices have not been a question of intelligence but of strength and weakness:

-To follow my heart and run away, rather than move to Pennsylvania with my parents as I sincerely wished to do at the time but lacked the mental strength to accomplish.

-To be the very worst, demonic, hostile, violent actor possible.

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