Felix and I were playing chess with his favorite Christmas present, a magnetic set with the hollows of the folding board lined with padding with cutouts for the various pieces, given to him by his dad. The 14 year old has been beating me 3 games to 1. As we were pulling out the pieces I asked, “Why are there two queens? Is this a specific Portland lesbian chess set?”
“No! Oh, that is so sick—I bet there is an LGBT chess club out there. What the extra queen is for is when I get one of my pawns to the end of the board, I can bring in a second queen.”
“I like that, a king should have the option of being served by two queens.”
“How would that work?” wondered Felix.
So we tried it out.
All the rules are the same, except queens can castle, since they are both bitch kings.
Tranny chess is about alternative goals, about victory conditions. Just like lesbian relationships compared to traditional relationships, tranny chess is more violent than standard chess.
The chief object is to exchange a pawn for a king.
Hence, genocide occurs when one player has lost all of his pawns and then has no chance of developing a king. A player with no pawns and no king loses immediately.
Once a victory level has been achieved the victor my declare that he is resting on that condition, define it as victory, and collect his points. Or he may seek a more definitive victory.
-1. Dynasty, placing a pawn at the opposite end of the board and bringing into play a king is a 1 point victory. The player may opt to go for tranny king and the entire 15 points.
= 1 point
-2. Genocide, killing all the other player’s pawns is a 2 point victory.
= 2 points
-3. Theocracy, killing both enemy queens permits that player to declare the patriarchy, and transform one of his bishops into a king. The king know moves as a bishop and once he returns to the kings throne victory is complete for 5 points.
= 5 points
-4. Hero King is occurs when a player who has lost one queen advances a knight to the back enemy row. That knight may now be exchanged for a king, who moves as a knight. Victory is complete when the knightly king returns to the throne.
= 8 points
-5. Seraglio king is achieved by meeting three conditions. The player must have two queens in play. One queen must castle. That rook is now eligible to advance to the enemy back row. Once this is done, he becomes a king that moves like a rook. So long as he returns to the throne he is a Seraglio King, even if one of his queens gets whacked, as he can get another, for 10 points.
= 10 points
-Tranny King or Bitchking, is achieved by placing a queen in the enemy back row and exchanging her for a king, actually getting the surgery, and then getting the king back to his starting point. This brings 15 points.
= 15 points
Genius. Simply genius. And shared.