Adam’s Email
Greetings, James! Hope that you are well. I'd like for you to take a look at this link for me, tell me what you think. While he raises good points, his tone borders on fearmongering. I know that I will have things to do when I'm no longer on my hands and knees scrubbing toilets, but what about the rest of us?
Stay safe,
The Man Answer
Yes Adam safe and staying. For those readers who do not know, Adam is a former member of my ace ghetto grocer janitorial crew now living in rural exile, far away from the bosom of Harm City. He and his team were the next best thing to owning four Mexican women and made my job fending off health inspectors possible.
After viewing the film Humans Need Not Apply [viewable below] one might suppose it was really a human question, but Adam is a man so it is still a man question.
I really liked this short film and the quirky autistic narration style.
What could save humanity from utter irrelevance?
The narrator provides the viewer with a clue when speaking of the massive carnage caused by human drivers. By the way, horses around 1900 killed 500 people a year in New York City and shit a literal mountain, the city being scented by a housing project sized heap of shit.
Humans Need Not Apply makes the assumption that Man’s inventiveness has driven his evolution and dominance. To a large degree this is so. But I am giving about half the credit to mankind’s violent nature. For instance Adam, recall your toilsome plight as my #2 janitorial engineer. Sure, one day a supermarket manager will have a bot to scrub those toilets out. But I on the other hand, diabolic fiend that I am, would continue to employ human janitors based on their potential for violence.
Freewheeling workplace robots will be made safe, unwilling to harm humans. On the other hand if I find myself-over matched in the shoplifter apprehensive department, I might with a single word launch you at my thieving foe like a 200 pound approval-seeking missile. Hell, if I have stopped the maggot in the immediate vicinity of the hottest babe in the building just to guarantee assistance from the young men on the crew [not that I would ever do such a dastardly thing] than I dare say your heroics would rise to deterrent levels of whoopass resulting in my shoplifters opting to become the competitor’s shoplifters, whose janitorial bot might even clean their sneakers with his customer friendly soft bristle broom while they rake bars of Dove soap off the shelf.
Of course, if these bots are made self aware enough to figure out what a ravenous plague of apes we are the danger to us is that they might band together as Earth’s janitorial squad and sweep us into the dustbin of history.
Sounds like the making of a good dystopian science fiction story. In a hundred years or so the government will just create robots to hunt down and exterminate all of the humans who are no longer needed. You'll be able to escape termination if you agree to be sterilized. Heck the Progressives and Fabian Socialists of the early 20th Century, like George Bernard Shaw and Margret Sanger, already devised the plan. youtube.com/watch?v=hQvsf2MUKRQ It's just that in the 21st or 22nd Century the job will be automated.
On the up side before the culling begins we'll all have lots of cool robots to play with. I want something like one of those robot mules the Marine Corps is developing for a guard dog. youtube.com/watch?v=cr-wBpYpSfE It will chase trespassers and yell at them with Samuel L. Jackson's voice: "Get off of my Lawn!"
The folks who work in the emergency rooms will have plenty of hilarious stories to tell about people who come to grief when their sexbots malfunction. Now how did you say that get stuck up there again?
I will try and write a story along these lines JB, and shall name you in the credits. I might make you a defendant in a class action suit filed by neglected tutorial bots...
And as for the ER staff, sex bots would make things more interesting for them. The ones I know could rack a game of 8-ball with the billiards balls they have extracted from our more sensitive men.
“We have reached the limits of what anal probing can teach us.” Kids in the Hall.
Billiard balls! WTF? Just when you think you've heard everything...
JB, every ER person I know, and the X-Ray techs, have a cue ball up the butt story. One guy kept coming back with them stacked up!
Then there was the bottle of Brute cologne spelled so close to the spelling of its location that I saw on a my chiropractor's X-ray panel...life in Sodom goes on...
Yuck!