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If Aliens Attacked...?
Two Woman to Man Questions from Sharon
© 2014 James LaFond
OCT/6/14
It is strange when people find out you are a writer that they begin asking questions when you'd rather be interviewing them for an oral history or a character sketch. I was recently speaking with a municipal government employee by the name of Sharon about her 'live shooter' training. I will post her impressions of this experience in a separate article. In the meantime I promised to answer two questions that immediately came to her mind when meeting me for lunch the day after discovering that her humble local daycare center is expected by people in the know to be on some terrorist's hit list.
Are Sanctions Really Hurting Russia as the Media has Reported?
I am no economist. All I can say is that in a world where what I am writing on is made in China, and what I just ate was grown in Central America, and what I am wearing is made in Southeast Asia, and in which many of my readers are European, any type of economic sanction against one nation will have negative effects on other nations, including our allies in the region.
Economic sanctions by France against Britain failed around about 1810 and precipitated one of the most disastrous invasions in human history.
Economic sanctions by the allies against post WWI Germany did trash the German economy, but caused a reactionary militarism that basically turned Europe into a 7 year bonfire in WWII.
Sanctions by the U.S. against Japan in the 1930s did nothing to make those people tow the line, or forestall the greatest naval war in human history. The last I checked the late Admiral Halsey was still killing Japs in Hell.
Economic sanctions against Iraq after the Gulf War failed to bring down that nation and did nothing to prevent a second war that is over a decade old and still going wrong.
From my reading of history it would seem that economic sanctions tend to fail the expectations of the economic aggressor and, in the long view, often seem to be indications of impending military action.
If Aliens Invaded Would Warring Nations Stop fighting and Band Together?
Okay, since you're cute and seemed to care I managed to hold in that hearty laugh that began to well up in my belly. I understand this to be a deep-seated humanist fantasy so will endeavor not to be too harsh. It depends on the type of aliens really. The thing to remember is that any alien species able to get to our solar system when we still have not been able to return to the equivalent of the solar shopping mall will be more advanced than us.
I will venture that if we are attacked by aliens of the type found in the movie Aliens, than we will band together as they showed zero diplomatic inclinations and just viewed the space marines as free range fast food.
On the other hand, if they are of the type found in the Predator movies—which is more likely as these guys could actually build stuff rather than just hatch eggs—then we could expect our experience as humans to be similar to either that of the Tasmanians or the Dodo Bird. If the alien predators decide to communicate like the Dutch and Brits did with the Tasmanians then we probably have a generation or two left before the last of us are stuffed and mounted in a zoological exhibit in a museum back on Planet Kickass. The absolute best case scenario would be if they treated us like the Europeans treated the Native Americans.
This alien strategy would go down like this: Ally with the Americans and wipe out every other nation on earth. South America can be a resort, Europe a museum, Asia a farm for breeding human prey, and Africa a gamer preserve. I envision the corporate office in Antarctica. The American population would be culled by 90% and allowed to exist as a breeding population of human blood hounds used to hunt down the Chinese that are released in Africa for big game hunts. The indigenous African population would be allowed to remain feral for sport hunting, but due to the rampant blood diseases would not be approved for making into human salami do be dished out at Manhattan banquets.
This is essentially what Europeans did to the indigenous American population, only I replaced the casinos with hunting preserves, which the Apaches would have preferred I think.
The human dynamic which permits this is that the strongest and second strongest human state will both seek to ally with the invaders to gain advantage and be on the winning side. The invader will pick a dog in that fight, back it to the hilt, and that dog will be forever his until he decides it has outlived its usefulness. Over and over again the conquistadors proved that a small body of technologically superior and ferocious invaders could, with the aid of indigenous allies, topple some of the greatest civilizations to be raised by man. The conquistador Bernal Diaz was astonished at the beauty and grandeur of the civilizations that he and his comrades managed to destroy; civilizations that in many respects were more advanced than his own, just not as advanced in the ways of war.
Oh Sharon, if you have a need for an author to read bedtime stories to the children at your daycare operation just before naptime, I am available.
‘Behavior That’s Admired’
the man cave
How Do I Rate My Power?
eBook
by the wine dark sea
eBook
thriving in bad places
eBook
when you're food
eBook
book of nightmares
eBook
let the world fend for itself
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wife—
eBook
the fighting edge
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orphan nation
Jeremy Bentham     Oct 8, 2014

"I've often wondered, what if all of us in the world discovered that we were threatened by an outer—a power from outer space, from another planet. Wouldn't we all of a sudden find that we didn't have any differences between us at all, we were all human beings, citizens of the world, and wouldn't we come together to fight that particular threat?"

-President Ronald Reagan, 4 May , Chicago, Il

“Nothing unites people like having something to be against.”

-President Harry Truman

Yes, the idea of Humanity uniting to fight an extra-terrestrial invasion is a fantasy shared by a lot of different people. A variation of the “why can’t we all just get along?” lament to be sure. A story I recommend about the nations of the earth uniting to fight space invaders is Harry Turtledove’s Worldwar series. In that storyline the alien invaders show up in the summer of 1942. It’s a great story; especially entertaining if you’re a history buff. Of course, Turtledove’s scenario doesn’t work if you place it 2014. That’s because another equally powerful Humanist fantasy, and one that has certainly taken hold in the past 72 years, is the idea that a benign and technologically superior race from another world will find us and lead us into paradise. Like a deus ex machina in an ancient Greek play they will appear out of nowhere and magically make all our intractable earthly problems just go away. At least that is fervent hope of many, isn’t it? So if the invaders were to show up tomorrow our government would probably capitulate. We’ll welcome them with open arms like Montezuma welcomed Hernando Cortez. If said extra-terrestrials are able to decipher our languages and connect to our internet when they do their initial reconnaissance, they will quickly figure out how gullible and superstitious we are (even the atheists). It will become apparent to them that a forced entry won’t be necessary and that they can subdue us simply by making us an offer for assistance we will find too appealing to refuse (If you like your planet you can keep your planet). By the time we figure out we’ve been swindled it will be too late. Besides, I can’t imagine our current political and social elites ever wanting to fight a war in which they themselves might possibly get hurt. As long as THEY got to continue to live a life of luxury they would probably be cool with being the rulers of a puppet state. Like King Herod of Judea to the Roman Empire.
James     Oct 8, 2014

Thanks for the quotes and I will get the Turtledove book. I like his stuff.

I can't see a leader of a first world postmodern nation having the stomach for personal risk, or risking military defense against an equal—let alone greater—power. I think that would hold even without nukes.
Jeremy Bentham     Oct 8, 2014

Well James you have identified the principle reason why nuclear weapons will never be banned completely, despite the fact that many leaders on both the political Left and Right (including Ronald Reagan) have expressed the wish that nukes could someday be done away with. The possibility that nuclear weapons might end up being used makes the prospect of ANY war between the major powers too scary to contemplate, thereby giving the major powers a strong incentive for seeking peaceful solutions to direct conflicts between them. It also makes a congressional declaration of war unthinkable since that would psychologically put every means of fighting the war on the table, including nukes. If nukes were to be done away with then we could return to fighting wars the good old-fashioned way with mass armies of conscripts, vast fleets of ships and air armadas that fill the sky. You know, just like back in dub-ya, dub-ya two. When you point that out to Leftie peaceniks, you find they generally like that idea even less. All of a sudden the deterrent effect of nuclear weapons becomes something to be valued. As you observed, it is hard to see how our current ruling class would have the stomach for any conflict in which a bomb might be dropped on THEIR house. For that matter our political leaders have demonstrated a lack of the will to win even in wars of limited scope. The strategy always seems to be to get out by a certain deadline rather than do what it takes as long as it takes to secure the defeat of the enemy. The dichotomy then is that America has a military that cannot be beaten and yet cannot win. Our enemies know that if they can survive the initial attack, maintain forces in the field and succeed in dragging out the fight past the third year our “corner” will automatically throw in the towel.

Oh by the way, it looks like the government IS preparing to combat an extra-terrestrial threat. It has decided to maintain a stockpile of nuclear warheads expressly for the purpose of preventing an asteroid from striking the earth. rt.com/usa/192384-usa-nuclear-weapons-asteroids. Yes, an asteroid striking the earth would be bad for the environment and would probably lead to an economic recession as well. Another good reason not to dismantle all the nukes.
James     Oct 9, 2014

Jeremy, I'm in tears from laughing. I just can't stop imagining some Leftie peacenik as one of the Kroft puppets as Reagan reaches for the room service button and nearly hits the red one instead, saying to the other peacenik puppet, "But if we take the doomsday Button away we might get drafted and Canada is full!"
Jeremy Bentham     Oct 9, 2014

Hey James, glad I was able to brighten your day.

"On the day when two army corps may mutually annihilate each other in a second, probably all civilized nations will recoil with horror and disband their troops."

-Alfred Nobel, 1801-1872
Jeremy Bentham     Oct 9, 2014

Oops! Correction: Alfred Nobel lived from 1833 to 1896. Don’t want to put out misinformation here.

Here's another good quote from ole’ Al:

“Lawyers have to make a living, and can only do so by inducing people to believe that a straight line is crooked.”

-Alfred Nobel
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