Sensei’s Ghost
Eddie was downstairs training in the dojo, trying to keep the karate thing going while all of the bad asses that he normally kicked it with down here were gone. Sensei Jan and Evil Randy were scooping up some old English dude named Burton, and Jay-Bone was living wild somewhere with LaLa, the ill-fated hip-hop honey that he had abducted in front of fifty people on the bus back in Baltimore when they had returned from their Ice Age mission.
Here you are son, trying to get this reverse-punch right while the real men are out there kicking ass, kidnapping smart White dudes, and macking women. What are you really doing with yourself?
Deep down Eddie knew, but he couldn’t say it, not even to himself. It hurt too much. Eddie had been in love since 33,000 B.C.—that would be about six months not counting the time-travel. Her name was Dawn Star. Three-Rivers had finally figured out her name for them. The little Indian genius had taken only a week to get to the bottom of the Neanderthal language, which consisted of signs, gestures, single single-syllable words, and instrumental song using the mouth as an instrument rather than to make words. Eddie had called her Cave-Girl from the start and she had eventually changed it to Vroom!-Girl after she fell in love with motorcycles.
She was all he had ever wanted since she had taken his virginity. Even though he was a nineteen-year-old crack-dealer he had never before known a woman and was convinced he was impotent after being repeatedly raped as a boy. The best part was that she was the only person who had ever believed in him and trusted him totally. He could not imagine living without her. There was only one small problem; even though Dawn Star was considered a woman among her people back in the Ice Age, according to Doctor London, she was only 13-years-old. In the 21st Century this made Eddie a child molester! As a time-traveler himself, Doc understood. But Tina, the evil-smoking-hot-creepy-killer-lesbian-dominatrix from the 24th Century, who formally adopted all of the primitive kids they grabbed, including his buddy Three-Rivers, had forbidden Eddie to touch Dawn Star and closely supervised their every visit.
Eddie wasn’t as smart as any of the genius’ here. But he knew two things that most of them did not: Tina could read minds; and Tina could speak to you in your head while she spoke to you with her mouth. She had not done this to him. But he knew she was doing it with the females recovered from the past, and with her lesbian wife Sharita…
So son, what you are really doing is hiding from Mammy.
Shoot, she’s the scariest bitch on the planet—and good looking! How wrong is that?
Get with the karate son. Make Jan proud when he comes back. You’ll show them all that you are no pervert. You will not lay a hand on your girl, even though she is pregnant with your baby—wow half-Black half-Neanderthal. What kind of chance will that kid have?
You are also not walking out on your kid, and you are not ever touching another woman. You are going to wait until she is 18—maybe Tina will give you a break and say 17?
Yeah, right homeboy!
Three-Rivers will tell Dawn Star that you’re waiting for her; faithfully. You can do this. By the time she’s 18 you’ll be teaching this stuff—kicking Sensei’s ass!
Just as he was throwing his 300th punch of the day Mister Epson entered the dojo in his weird white tuxedo and bowed. “Mister Edison, good day to you. Miss Tina would like a word with you in the conference chamber.”
He nodded, bowed out and undid his white belt as the man faded quietly away.
You hear that spaghetti western music in the back of your mind son—you screwed. I just hope she leaves enough to I.D.
Colder Than Ice
When he got to the conference room Tina was standing there in purple silk, looking like the queen of some alien Chinese planet. She was holding an envelope and greeted him with an icy nod. “Tom—she knows how that hurts, that the name reminds you of the priest—I have your severance pay here. You are being paid for the next inception even though we are severing our relationship with you.”
What? This can’t be? I’m part of the team. I’m part of the karate class. I’m going to be a father. I belong here.
The room started spinning while her voice seemed to echo inside of his head as she spoke. What she said with her mouth registered just a moment before what she thought into his brain, “Thomas, your service has been valuable. We are, however, moving on to more complex mission planning and require more robust and highly skilled operatives. I will be available for post-employment counseling. Toward this end we encourage you to keep your cell phone, at our expense. I trust fifty thousand dollars severance pay will go a long way toward starting a new life. You have until tomorrow afternoon to depart. ”
That was what his ears heard. His mind, however, echoed a different version, “Reviled insect, you are a parasite. We do not need or want you. I will be watching you. Keep your cell so that I know your location. Discard it and I shall hunt you down and mutilate you before death. Do the world a favor and invest this money in a drug venture and return to your life of crime. Do not let me find you here when I return from my hunt.”
He could not look at her. When he saw Three-Rivers coming he could not even look at him. He went to the room he shared with Jay-Bone and cried himself to sleep.
Damn son, you are back to being nothing again, nothing!
