“Dude, I hate pigs, and I hate these ghetto motherfuckers. So next time I’d like to see the pigs at least get their licks in. How can they suck so totally with that riot gear? How could the pigs not get their ass kicked so badly the next time? And also, would you be willing to train ‘em?”
For the record I despise the police and the ghetto hoodrats they battle, so Steevo and I are on the same page there. I would not work for a gang, nor would I work for something even more corrupt, such as a police department. However, if individuals, or even pairs or trios of cops or gang bangers came to me looking for riot instruction I would coach them, at no charge, because I don’t take dirty money knowingly. [I did recently take $80 from a former police supervisor who is now a practicing lawyer, for a consultation.]
Why?
In my mind combat bestows virtue on the otherwise un-virtuous. Indeed, the term virtue comes from the Latin virtus. Which basically means ‘prepared to kick your hairy barbarian ass, so that I can enjoy your woman’s soft barbarian ass.’
High-minded ethical concerns out of the way, what would the training look like?
I have included a street level video below which you may use a reference. Incidentally, in the video below the cops fought like squeamish Aztecs and the hoodrats fought like conquistadors did when they were outnumbered.
Gear
The police riot gear sucks. Realizing that most cops are wimps and will be tossed shit equipment and remain untrained in close combat, I suggest that athletic cops train up on their own as strike teams, replacing the following crappy equipment with the real deal.
1. Worst of all is the helmet. A real riot busting cop needs to be wearing a hockey helmet with full face cage. Just buy whatever the PBR studs are wearing.
2. Riot shields suck! I once destroyed a riot shield of the round German police design that is better than what we see these cops using on TV. I smashed that shield up with a rattan stick while fighting Big Robert Gyer in about 1 minute. I suggest Cold Steel or another brand of polyethylene shields for small shields on the strike teams. For large strike team shields use the ballistic door-crashing shields usually wasted on crashing in some ghetto door. We have made our own shields from a polyethylene oil drum barrel, and they are almost indestructible, even against steel. The top and bottom make two bucklers and the body makes two Roman scutum-style body shields.
3. Asp batons, in evidence in the accompanying video, always fail on contact and rarely stop active aggressors. Keep that thing on your belt for a back up or for breaking windows.
4. Traditional police batons are okay, but a little short and a little too likely to crack a skull, and the last thing a Baltimore cop needs is a dead hoodrat carcass on his hands. Cops who are stuck with the crappy riot shield should use these.
5. Riot sticks were designed to be wielded from horseback, using the horse's body mass. On foot the reach is largely wasted. Riot sticks on foot should be used like a two handed sword, as all but heavyweight stick fighters are going to lack the forearm strength to use this weapon with dexterity with one hand. Give your biggest men riot sticks and increased body armor—base ball shins and lacrosse shoulders—and use them as part of a four man team, discussed in tactics below.
6. Rattan sticks of ¾ inch thickness and 28 inches in length, with carved butts should be used by any hand to hand effectives other than the big boys with the riot sticks. They handle better, break less often, break less bones, and shock more soft tissue than traditional hard wood batons.
Skills
The following skills are equally required and can be taught up to effect in 1 hour sets, taking 24 hours to reach a self-trainable level of competence for most fighters.
1. Stick stroking
2. Stick retention
3. Shield use
4. Mobility
Below is a link on stick stroking in which Charles and I hit the bag with rattan sticks, with body mechanics explained in the accompanying text.
Tactics
Against lateral formations like the shield wall used by the cops and the open skirmishing swarm used by the hoodrats, the wedge formation works equally well, and was deployed by Macedonian and Norman horseman, who were renown for dealing death blows to light and heavy troops alike. As with any combat victory goes to he who dominates the combat space, and that is more about mobility than anything.
The basic Norman configuration was three troopers in a wedge. As our hood rat and cop forces will not be slashing and stabbing with swords and lances and continuing on by, but are focused on looting and taking prisoners, I have various recommendations for the two sides.
1. The cops should place a big armored man with riot stick in the open end of the three man wedge. With the objective of the three men in the wedge to be largely getting his big ass on the target. The wedge itself should form up first with a point man with a large shield, and second by left flanker with a small shield. This guy should be your best stick.
2. The right wing of the wedge should be held by a left hander, or a right hander trained to use a shield in his right hand. He is the formation maintenance guy. The problem with shield-based formations is a tendency to drift to the right behind the next soldier’s shield [held in his left hand], with the last guy on the right, not having cover on the flank, and edging toward whatever covering terrain there is. The right flanker should keep his hand empty and on the point man’s back. He would be the officer as well, with an asp on his belt. This four man team has two dedicated shield men who should move offensively, and two dedicated stick strikers who would use the cover of the point and right flanker as a base of operations.
3. Unit tactics with cop wedges are flexible, and should be based on three wedges ranging out to the front and flanks of a shield wall, instead of these slacker cops wandering around the backfield as seen on the video. The shield wall should shield a medical team, so that casualties do not have to be dragged a significant distance. There should be a four man rear guard armed with beanbag shotguns to make certain there is no overrun, and for use in dealing with rooftop threats.
4. Your operational cop riot unit should consist of 1 20-person static shield wall, two medics and two commanding officers behind the wall, a 4-man rear guard, and three 4-man wedges, for a total of 40 persons, only 12 of whom need be combat qualified with the stick and shield, the rest operating in a support role.
5. For you hoodrats I suggest the same 4-man wedge formation, with three dudes with trash can lids and bats forming the point and flanks of the wedge and one dude, with a real good throwing arm, armed with a first baseman’s mitt for catching whatever the cops might throw back his way. He should not have to carry his ammo. I recommend that the point man and flankers each have a backpack full of ammo: halved bricks to hit the shield wall, lacrosse balls and stones to harass cops who actually have balls, and whole bricks to bust up hard-headed pigs.
I stand willing to coach either side, and even referee organized skirmishes. Have at it, and please, try to do better than this. I don’t want to give those boys in Kiev an excuse to laugh at our rioting and counter rioting methods the next time.
Peace is for pussies.
Don’t forget the scoops…The scoops are on the way!
bing.com/videos/search?q=soylent+green+the+scoops+are+on+the+way&FORM=VIRE4
Thank for that heads up Jeremy.
I would dearly love to see hoodrats scooped up like milk duds at an old time candy counter...
You forgot the most important member of the police formation without whom it would never work - the Cheka officer to shoot those who abandon the formation. Average, non- swat cops are trained to never fight fair, so what you are describing goes against all their training.
Let's compromise and have me beat them across the back with a rattan rod. I'd love to be a Centurian, if just for one day.
“An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer.”
-Chabrias, Athenian General, 4th century B.C.
Another thing we must keep in mind in our discussion of tactics is the importance of effective leadership and the aggressive will to win to the successful conduct of any conflict. That was sorely lacking on the part of the Baltimore police and the individual police officers suffered defeat and humiliation on account of it. The political leadership of Baltimore did not want to win the fight against the rioters; it didn't advance their hidden agenda to suppress the urban unrest. Remember that the police were told to “stand down”, to not seek to disperse or defeat the rioters, to merely contain the protest/riot. So that is what the cops did. Deprived of the authority and ability to take to fight to the enemy, they adopted defeatist tactics. Tactics intended merely to help avoid injury to themselves while “containing” the disorder. They stood in a line with shields and made themselves targets for the brick throwing hoodrats. Presumably the cops were to maintain this posture until the hoodrats grew weary of the game and went home. The last thing the city leaders wanted was for the police to “win ugly”. In their minds they did not want to have to look at video of cops clubbing down protesters with wild abandon... you know like in Chicago 1968. The Woman didn’t care that this excessively passive posture made the police to look like incompetent, impotent fools. The Woman hates all cops and soldiers on general principles anyway. Even the ones that serve her. So if any of those jingoistic myrmidons end up looking like goofs while carrying out Her wishes, so fucking what?!
I know I'm hard on the cops.
Seeing this video really made me feel bad for the cops that got hurt, who had been failed at every level by their leadership.
James,
Why do you feel that asp batons always fail? The video doesn't really depict any melee attacks with them.
I have one of my own, and although I've never had a need to use it on an attacker, it always has seemed particularly brutal to me, like it could easily break bones. After reading your comment, I did a search and the only think I could find was an LEO forum saying the same thing that you did. From a tactical standpoint, why don't they pass the test? How have you seen them used (poorly) against attackers?
I have interviewed two cops who have used them, and in both instances they failed to stop the suspect, and bent like a coat hanger. Also, in Loren Christianson's book on skinhead street gangs he describes a West Coat cop bending his asp over a skinheads cranium, which did not stop said skinhead.
I have fought with 1/2 inch aluminum rods and 1 1/4 inch steel pipes—actually lost most of those—and can attest that the flesh shock is nothing compared to rattan, and the bone damage is no worse than oak. Metal needs to be heavy to work as a blunt object. You want a bar, not a pipe, if you are crippling someone. The ASP is essentially a pipe. I recommend it as a weapon for tight spots like doorways, halls and restrooms. It is handy for breaking and entering. I could make it work, since I've had over 600 stick fights, and am a good hand sniper, but would prefer something more reliable.
The one time the asp has been used effectively was against a knife, paired with a smock [cloth work garment]. But the knifer was behaving ineffectively, and Mister Kenneth was in a chump stomping mood.If you are going to use the ASP strike the hands and the ear [this could kill, even with this piece of junk so don't do it casually]. Do not come down on the head, and you are probably wasting your time on the shoulder unless the dude is a bone rack. It is better than nothing, and recommended primarily because it is easy to carry and deploy.
The bad legal point is that this metal telescopic baton will punch a hole in a head—which could be bad legal news for the wielder. Also, it does not have the mass to impart sufficient shock, and it is the shock that stops, not the cracked bone. Functionally I do not trust the thing for a thrust, and suspect it might collapse.
This summer I promise to gather various blunt implements and test them on video. And please, don't even thing about using the spring action ASP.