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‘Look Up, Amazed By God’
Columbine Joe!: Excerpt from a Conversation with a Christian Missionary
© 2015 James LaFond
AUG/18/15
I was stocking the freezer this morning when Columbine Joe happened by, pushing his mountain bike down the aisle. The resulting conversation lasted over an hour and was, as usual, wide ranging.
His first words were, “Way to keep the faith, brother. Love the shirt, the psalms are really where it’s at for the committed Christian.”
I was wearing the shirt given me by the Christian who I gave permission to marry my sister. She didn’t care what I thought about the arrangement, but he did. Although I am not a Christian, it is my favorite shirt, a nice heavy t-shirt. On the front of the 2X navy blue shirt is the image of an astronaut looking up into heaven. Above this image in large yellow letters is “LOOK UP!”
Below, in script is “amazed by God.”
Beneath the feet of the astronaut is a cratered moonscape and beneath that: CFC ACTION CAMP 2015, psalm 123:1
On the back of the shirt is that psalm
“To you I lift up my eyes, oh you who are enthroned in the heavens!”
Columbine Joe is troubled by my belief in violence over love, and my utter lack of a need for forgiveness. He does not witness to me. We discuss theology, learning one from the other. It is enough that we both despise atheism as human self-worship, and have both been creeped out by Pentecostals. We have a common ground.
He nodded to the shirt and said, “That could give some the wrong impression.”
I responded, as I stocked the Eggo Chocolate Chip waffles, “Deception of the enemy is to the good. As for my Christian friends, well, Yahweh and Odin are both sky gods. It’s not like I’m worshipping that fecund Earth Mother disguised as Mother Mary, and I have no notion of luring you away from the adoration of your hanged Hebrew.”
“Of course,” he retorted, "A one-eyed god has to pick and choose. At least he’s not a child molester like Zeus—If you were a follower of Zeus I’d have to give you some shit about that.”
Columbine Joe can quote large stretches of the Bible from memory, which amazes me, and is useful, as I don’t see me revisiting that text in a comprehensive manner for some time. He gives me quotes and I give him historical leads and anecdotes. He is among a number of devotedly religious people I have met, with a very interesting past. Our conversation ended on a comparison of Intelligent Design and Hinduism, which boggles his mind. However, as a writer, I have no problem with the possibility that The Universe is nothing more than the dream of a god.
In the cause of writing various religious characters, I find interactions with people like Columbine Joe to be invigorating.
He inspires me, and I truly hope he never gets nailed to a dead tree.
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