“Mister LaFond, I’d like to tell you about the most brutal shit I’ve been involved in, but don’t want to implicate myself. So how about the funniest brutal shit I’ve been involved in?
“It was up here in Park Heights, right around the corner, the playground on the corner of Winner. I was seventeen, hanging out with dudes that were a bit older, eighteen to early twenties. It was summer time, about eleven at night, en you know how niggas do, right?
“Well, I suppose not, Mister LaFond. So here how it go in the hood when you hangin’ out, up to no good. You pick on the weak one, not some dude that might be walking by—which would be pretty much a dumbshit thing to do on his part, so you wonder if he is insane or packin’ so you let that go. You pick on your own, the dumbest, the smallest, the youngest, the most deserved nigga of the night.
“Now that shit has not come about yet en we get to shootin’ dice. Then this one dumb nigga lose, en don’t have any money on him, can’t pay up. He’s like, ‘Let me go home en get ma money,’ en we like, ‘Nigga, its on!’
“So he gets beat down, then stomped—I know, it’s not funny yet, kind of sad really, but it gets better, I promise. So there it go, up in the niggadom shootin’ dice like a dumbshit, with no money and he’s prayin’ en payin.’
“Now, he is a hommie—dumbshit though he be—so it’s not like he goin’ ta get kilt or maimed, just lumped up. So somebody—not sayin’ who—gets the idea to strip his ass. His clothes come off en he standin’ there buttaball nekked, and someone—not sayin’ who—gives him a sock to wear on his dick, and there he goes, runnin’ down the street to his sister’s house with a sock on his dick!
Now, Mister LaFond, you can say what you want, but must admit, that that shit was funny. If it had happened today you would a had twenty niggas videoin’ that shit and uploading it.”
-Negrodamus, 2/6/16
