This chronology begins at puberty, part way through my eleventh year, at which point I became extremely anti-social, spent my time alone listening to music, lifting weights, hitting the heavy bag and speed bag, and reading. As a child I had noted that physical attacks upon my person were either preceded by threats by adults or insults by children and youth. Henceforth, any adult threat or child or youth insult resulted in me launching either a spontaneous attack or planning an ambush and seeking out the “mouth” for a lonely confrontation. Outside of school I liked alleys a lot. In school I liked restrooms and stairwells.

I was well aware that my ultimate enemy was the adult world; that these violent kids had literally been set upon me by grownups, sometimes with the grownup’s commands still ringing in my ears as I was attacked and beaten. I went to bed every night fantasizing about killing men in combat—which became a singular obsession with me.

The chronology ends two months into my 18th year.

The chronology is divided by age, the antagonists assigned as underclassmen, classmates, upper classmen and men.

1. School restroom: attacked two classmates who submitted to strikes

2. School stairwell, attacked classmate who submitted to strikes

3. Alley, tried to stab man who backed away

4. School grounds: chased Charlie after school, tackled him at the edge of the property under a stand of pines, and beat him until he couldn’t breathe

5. School grounds: chased Charlie to same spot and punched him, whereupon he fell back and played dead

6. School grounds: Charlie waited for me under the trees, fell over when I neared him, and when I mounted him for the obligatory beating, convinced me that we should be friends, since neither of us had any

7. Alley, while walking home with Charlie to see his model car collection, two older teenagers stepped away from a fence to block our a path. Having previously decided that larger teens and adults would be stabbed or have their throats bitten out, I advanced with my lips peeled back to rip out a throat and they backed off. Charlie seemed pleased.

8. Alley, I cornered a 19-year-old stoner in the alley behind Glen Keith Boulevard and tried to bite his throat out, but he kept squirming against the wall, broke my hold and ran whereupon I punched him and he fell. He then ran on his knees and then feet until he got out to the street. I remember hoping he would be run over, but had no such luck.

9. School restroom, strangled a classmate until he cried, then told him I would kill him if he ever insulted me, and let him go

10. Stalked and then chased the same 19-year-old stoner to Loch Raven Boulevard and pushed him out into traffic, but the adult lady hit the brakes and then yelled at me, so I walked away, wondering how one kills motorists who decline to run over your prey…

11. Alley, thinking that a college student was giving me threatening looks while he worked on his car, I grabbed a file I had sharpened into a dagger and decided to stab him in the neck while he worked on his car. As I approached him with the hidden weapon, he looked at me and smiled and asked me how I was doing. Life was becoming complicated. I began to rethink violence and decided to box instead of attack people in school and in alleys. Then we moved to rural Pennsylvania.

12. Punched out Brian in front of the principal’s office and was referred to a police officer by the principal, who was a very nice man and did not deserve to have Brian—who had insulted my mother—bleeding on his desk.

13. Grassy lot, match-fight against class mate, KO by body slam.

14. Street, punched out classmate who threatened me

15. Locker room, attacked and slammed classmate, KO against the lockers, because he had made fun of my severe acne

16. Schoolyard, match-fight, KO by slam on classmate

17. Street, match-fight against upperclassman, high school senior, fought to a draw

18. Sidewalk, attacked classmate and body slammed him, knocking him unconscious for saying something bad about my mother

19. Locker room, punched a classmate in the gut because I heard him making fun of me. While he was trying to get his breath I told him that I would kill him and his parents if he went to school officials

20. School bus, was attacked by female upperclassmen and bit her arm, drawing blood. This had to do with the fact that freshmen in high school were supposed to be humiliated by upperclassmen on their first day—the legendary "initiation." My little brother was quite brutalized. By now the large senior males were leery of me and had sent this girl after me.

21. School hallway, stabbed a classmate when I mistakenly thought he was picking a fight with me. I broke the pencil off in between his ribs. A teacher watched and did nothing, later trying to recruit me to attack and disable students from rival schools—this was the school soccer coach and he wanted me breaking feet for the team. I declined, my hatred and distrust of adults serving for the good in this instance.

22. School bus, stabbed insulting classmate in thigh with pencil, pulled it straight out instead of breaking it off

23. Wooded lot, Rick and I attacked two high school seniors, a boxer and a karate black belt. They surrendered when we came at them with a sawed off fire axe and a homemade steel spear made from a fence post.

24. Patio, my 18-year-old cousin poked me with a stick, which I snatched away and broke over his head

25. Basement, my cousin pursued me into the house and down the stairs, where I put him out with an uppercut-elbow combination, but decided against finishing or scalping him, since my mother liked him.

26. Street, fought a man to a bloody draw in match fight, in which I was badly beaten, having my left eye closed.

27. Basement, fought my brother in a brutally senseless brawl, in which we destroyed a wall and finally became friends.

I believe having sex with Mrs. Johnson on her washroom floor convinced me that a combination of making women squeal and sparring with martial artists and boxers would be preferable to fighting outside of a sporting context. I now avoided fights and donated my excess testosterone to the cause of banishing Mrs. Johnson’s mid-life crises.

28. While arranging for a second date with a 27-year-old woman who had me understanding why Mrs. Johnson wanted to recapture her youth, one of my friends attacked my little brother in the next room. It was a serious attack. I had no time for this shit since I was setting up a date, and grabbed my homemade broad sword from my room and told my friend to leave. This was a big mistake, as my friend was crazed over some religious issue and did not believe that I would use the sword on him. As he advanced on me, seemingly intent to take the sword, I tried to cut his head off, and failed, cleaving his arm in half instead, cutting through the ulna bone and crushing the radial when he raised it for a roof block. After somehow beating the attempted murder and assault with a deadly weapon charge, I moved to Baltimore to get a job and avoid a law suit.

16 were horizontal, between people in my age class

5 were hierarchal, in which adults or older youths initiated the aggression

7 were heretical, in which I initiated aggression against older youths and adults

None of these incidents were interracial.

Only one of these incidents represented a group initiated attack.

Only one of these incidents had an individual attacking a group.