“Just in at the Dinustan News Desk, innocent, unarmed, Dindu youth to be free, free at last!

“Jungle Jim here, to assure you guilt ridden residents of Whitebreadistan, that your client thugs in Dindustan will now be unshackled when they appear before the judge. The question is, what does this signify? Let me turn the keyboard over to renowned Dinduologist, Webone Shoop.

“Well Webone, what’s up with the shackles coming off?”

“Yeah, this is the kind of thing you white folks wouldn’t know anything about. It’s pretty simple, really, JayJay, that is if you can set your prejudice aside for just a moment and consider the complexity of Dindu diction. Now, would you expect some Italian chef to go on and on about expeller pressed olive oil without using his hands? No, you would not, because his ass is almost entirely white—so he gets a pass. Yet, with just a little bit of black in him, you understand that that Italian scallion needs some hands in the mix to be understood at the nuanced level.

"So, if my man, Crinkle be pleading his case in front of Judge Jewy, we are talking about more nuances than any Tuscan sauté. I mean how’s an undergraduate of shit-ass public schools gonna sell, “Serious yo Hona, I jus’ seen Scotta go down like dat—I dindu nuffin!”

“Thank you, Webone Shoop, for that insightful tutorial!”

R.I.P. Scoota, here’s a forty to you, son.