FYI, if you are bound for Washington D.C. from Damascus, by way of Istanbul and London, to strap on a vest of C-4 at the inauguration of The White Dragon, might we suggest that you prepare your vest, pray for your 74 virgins and spend your terror-tourist dollars in Baltimore City? We are just 40 miles from your target and our quaint town features many amenities, including 25,000 vacant houses within which you might construct IEDs, assemble weaponry and even test-fire your side-arms. See J-bar at the Edmonson Village Barber Shop for your AK-47s, Dejon at the Lexington market for your nine-mm, Vedra Khan at Sunny's Quick Stop up on the Eastside for your knife needs, and Tyrone across from the Northeastern District Court House for your ride—his cousin can supply you with pitbulls to watch your shit while you're gone, too.
To be certain that this is the best possible terror-tourist experience you could hope for, Mayor Stem-cell Rawlings-Blake has ordered her personal bodyguard—the Baltimore City Police—to desist from checking the citizenship status of the people they encounter. And believe we, she is good for it. Ever since she told her bodyguards to let her constituents—and the drug gangs that helped finance her political campaign—destroy what they will, Baltimore has become a nocturnal war zone and a daylight crime zone. You should feel right at home.
Harm City is an open city.
Welcome to Baltimore.
I have noticed that all the doctors and scientists on tv are dindus. I bet a lot of them are from Baltimore and if not given room to destroy by the mayor they would have ended up in prison instead of becoming doctors and scientists. I think the key to our great country's future is to harness all that brain power in the black gorillas organization and put it to work solving our most pressing problems and being the engine to move civilization forward.
No. No. I can't go along with this. If terrorist blew something up there...how would anyone know? :)