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At the Speed of Smell
The Shit They Put in Coke By Professor X
© 2017 Professor X
MAR/31/17
Just sit back, pour a Bacardi, coke with ice, take a long drink and…consider, that you did not drink liquid shit from illegal migrants.
In Northern Ireland police are investigating human shit found inside a number of empty cans at a Lisburn Coca Cola factory in Northern Ireland:
The cans came from Germany, and it is speculated by racists, you know, deplorables like you and me, only over in the Emerald Isle, that illegals made a journey to freedom/welfare in the lorry, and thought that shitting in the cans would be good.
No doubt, the migrants, if they did shit in the cans, squatted over the said cans. Obviously they could not have sat on the can rims, or they would have cut their hairy butt cheeks. Therefore, to pass the time, the cans must have been all put together, touching each other. Then, a presumably hardish turd, perhaps due to a semi-dehydrated state, produced in the truck, was sploshed on the cans, and eager fingers, huddled the turdette neatly into a can(s). All gift-wrapped for an Irish Christmas.
This raises many other challenging questions. First, the story said that it took the workers 15 hours to clean the machines. But, if the shit was in cans, then how did the shit get into machines? And, I know that shit stinks really quickly, at the speed of smell, really, so why the fuck didn’t the lorry driver notice that there was a shit smell meandering from the back of this truck? Even on ice, he should have smelt that gut-wacking odor, when pulling back the tarp, to reveal, shit-in-a-can. Was he an illegal migrant, driving a truck to freedom, in the land of racists?
Finally, in the wonderfully diverse Third World that is being created, where all will be equal at the bottom of the wheelie bin, will anyone in the food and drink industry, if it still exists, worry about minor things, like migrants using food-processing facilities as sewers? Isn’t it racist to be concerned about such culturally relative things anyway, a Eurocentric obsession, if not fetish to be free of germs (germs being symbols for the racial other in the racist minds of whites):
Oh, why I am climbing to the summit of the high moral ground, and digging at Europe (file note: something wrong with metaphor mix, make note to change before emailing, otherwise PhD English guys at site will sodomize article), what do you think of this EU wanker:
EU Commission president, Jean-Claude Juncker, slurred that he would push for Ohio and Texas to split from the rest of America if the Republican president does not bend over and part his butt cheeks for the globalists become more supportive of the EU. Well, he didn’t actually give the butt metaphor, but it was in that direction, and I really needed image flow.
I don’t think that any metaphor would be unfair to him, because this is a guy who has claimed to be in contact with aliens. Not, not migrants, but weird fuckers from other worlds, real extraterrestrials:
The folk from a place far, far, away, are shit worried about Brexit:
Look at Mr Red-as-Pissed-Face in action here:
If these guys just shat in coke cans, who would care, but it is these types that run world affairs, and run them into the ground.
Take Dick Cheney for another example, who has said that Russia’s election interference is an “act of war’:
Trump better win next time or the likes of these fuckers will ensure nuclear holocaust. Remember Cheney’s famous words, or is it threat: “It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you.”
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