This is the best Christian flip-comic ever! I heard these are getting rare, and since this one is copyright 1996, I wanted you to be able to enjoy it, so I shall narrate it page by page.

Cover: Two eight year old girls hug and cry, holding an LSD lollypop between them.

Page 2-3: The slightly older girl—trailed by the evil cat that shows up tormenting babies in other J.T.C. comics—approaches her friend in a flowerbed and announces that she has a new best friend. Now, J.T.C. isn’t going to send either of these adorable children to hell. So the comic is a simple narrative of how the girl was saved, how Jesus can be the best friend of them both, and that he has already built them a mansion in great neighborhood called heaven. The real story is the cat: who attacks a nest of crow chicks, is dive-bombed by their mother, and gets in a fight with a nasty terrier while mice look on, pointing fingers and laughing.

Page 6-8: J.T.C. is big on original sin, illustrates Adam and Eve about to commit the first sin, a badass sword wielding Angel of God evicting them from their plush digs, and then illustrates kid-level sins committed by a bunch of ugly brats as a vulture looks on.

Page 9: The girl that has been saved begins confessing her sins as her cat sneaks up on a bird, which is rescued by a veritable squirrel militia unit hurling pinecones and acorns.

Page 10: a number of obnoxious children [that’s me with the sling shot] are shown being barred from entry into heaven by the Angel of God, who apparently reserves his sword for adults.

Page 11: As the bible is being discussed around a square pond stocked with a small zoo of suburban animal life, the dog sneaks up on the cat, while a 40 pound carp eyes the girls hungrily.

Page 12: Divine conception is being discussed by the saved girl as the cat brawls with a goose and the squirrel militia turn their antiaircraft acorns on the crow, all viewed from ringside by a rabbit eating a carrot.

Pages 13-14: The younger girl is having doubts about Jesus as the cat is being routed by the goose and tries to catch up with his owner.

Pages 15-16: J.T.C.’s faceless God is depicted as loving ‘all of us’ [even Jews and Muslims]. As this is for kids the eternal torment of these false believers is not graphically depicted.

Page 17: The nativity is dynamically wrought from a humanistic angle, and then the standard midnight lightning-lit crucifixion is given as a dark counterpoint.

Pages 18-19: The ascension, repentance, damnation and eternal life are concisely covered.

Pages 20-22: The younger girl accepts Jesus and exclaims, “I feel so good! My sins are gone. Now Jesus is my best friend too!” The girls then decide that they will live next door to each other in heaven, even as the evil cat and the mangy terrier stop their fighting, with the cat even smiling!

This is a real good piece of kiddy indoctrination. The only heavy bit was the midnight crucifixion, which is a must. Knowing that the cast of The Little Rascals has gone to hell made me feel better about my day. I was a little miffed about the conversion of the evil cat to Christian ways. I suspect he’ll be up to his old antics in the next issue.