Just this morning I found out through the godless media voice of CNN that Omaha Nebraska police have wrongly abducted and videoed the future President of the United States flipping them off and cussing them out. What else is a diapered dude supposed to do when Five-O kicks in yo door before the Honey Nut Cheerios be done? They then compounded their atrocity by unjustly labeling him a ‘thug toddler’, uploading the video to YouTube and taking him from the custody of the future Mother Dowager of our great empire.

With stuff like this going on I’m prepared to believe anything. Then, I got a call a scant hour ago on the Ghetto Grocer Hotline from an embattled ghetto cashier who has just experienced the following.

The day before yesterday, in a major supermarket, operated by a national retailer, Tashika [a black female liberal democrat] was manning her register when three black male transvestites came to her line. They each set what might, or might not have been, separate orders on her belt. Then the lead tranny walked away. Wondering if she should begin ringing out the order as one, or as three separate purchases, Tashika pointed to the cross-dressing man and said to his friends, “Is he goin’ ta pay for that?”

The three men then began to howl with disapproval over her discriminating against the hairy-legged male in the miniskirt by referring to him as a ‘he’. He was ‘as much a bitch as her’, and would not be denied his identity. A protracted scene ensued as management and even law enforcement was called to deal with this violation of hermaphroditic rights!

Finally, the episode entered its most bizarre stage when the store manager [a white male conservative republican] confronted Tashika—an unlikely martyr for the neo-conservative cause if ever there was one. He said, “Tashika, why did you have to call her a he?”

In keeping with her belief in clear gender identification, just like Perpetua before the leopard in the arena, she stood her ground, “Because that is obviously a dude!”

The diplomatic manager continued, “Couldn’t you have at least apologized?”

Although I am not certain that her head bobbed horizontally above her shoulders, one may be forgiven for assuming that it did just that as she said, “What, for not bein’ blind?”

All I know at this point is that ‘corporate’ is attempting to deflect a lawsuit, most likely via recourse to the venerable retail food tradition of, ‘Throwin’ her ass under the bus!’

I have no comment, other than to once again note that I am serenely pleased that I am no longer standing in her manager’s shoes.