Many western cultural males are sublimely accomplished liars in their expression. One really good indicator (not foolproof) of the western male character you wish to assess, is to observe his woman’s expression I was walking and noticed a little kid, about 2 ½ years old, stopped to jump up and down from sheer joy of life. This was importune because the more important adult did not wish to be annoyed in the slightest in his desire to walk with some great dignity?

His important appointment? He paused only long enough to grab his little boy by the arm and smack his butt, bringing hurt to a once joyful child’s expression and of course tears as the child was instructed to dutifully march after

The man’s expression? Normal throughout. As though this were a regular guy you’d have no concern to meet and become acquainted. His wife? Silent, but with hurt and pained expression, the lines increasingly permanent from habit. Here, a superficial male dignity imposes a great indignity upon the human spirit

She can say nothing or likely he beats her, behind closed door. She will not age gracefully, her beauty sacrificed to stress in a slavery to machismo, where a rule of law in too many case gives lip service to the rights of women, nothing more. Her son, the little boy, will be as his father before him, his mother capitulated and become the violence of the man who owns her, his future wife and daughters bond servants, mortgaged to violence

I do notice some things. For four months there had been an attractive woman, a single mom, minding her own business, raising kids… nothing remarkable, there are many good looking women in Spain, and other than to notice her and other ‘cliff dwellers’, the unavoidable life observed from my rooftop had been mostly uneventful

After four months, it seemed overnight, she turned into a harpy, a super-bitch and terrorist of her children. I puzzled on that for a couple of days, an event one cannot ignore, wondering why this sudden onslaught of what should not be dismissed as PMS (a favorite ploy of men), and the reason became manifest: there was now a man

in her life. She had scored her Playgirl magazine model This follows on my observing another (neighboring) family in a circumstance of domestic violence, I decidedly noticed women who are beaten or otherwise abused or put down by their men, take it out on the kids, they terrorize their children in turn

Following on the preceding, the kids already are acting out at an age that simply is amazing. The little girl already screaming out at every move her older brother makes, that was not noticed before, she is not yet old enough to talk much and he is not much older than that. This phenomena had been nearly immediate, the onset within a mere week or two

This must become the shadow boxing I have observed in the male teens, when walking the Rambla or the beach boardwalks in my vicinity, thinking to myself the beautiful young girl is going to be beaten by her boyfriend who is mock threatening her with his fist, by this age numbed to violence as a woman, she puts up with it passively, dismissively or in a very superficially annoyed way.. neither leaving nor decisively facing the boy down

She will set out to be conquered as a social expectation, as I have observed in lovers a few years older, where in full public view, lying on the sand, she submits to a virtual rape with a weak appearance of resistance as he pins her down with his arms and body, in a simulated violence mocking the act of making love

Children will, of course, more often than not come after, and the cycle must begin again… an ever growing phenomena

One interesting thing to me, is these women, although they have a sort of awareness, they must, because of not only observable anger, but also guilt and shame (you can observe these as well), do not actually think about their circumstance in a frontal way. Otherwise they would not be caught in such a circumstance, or at least one must suspect this would be the case

Follows the thought, why would it be any surprise these women fear men, or simply do not like them, the eye contact is not often friendly and often not friendly at all, most women are simply afraid to meet you with the eyes, yet it occurs to me the men many of these women must be acquainted with are as great a threat as any stranger. A Native American woman, Fee Tenkiller, observed:

“A culture based on machismo is one of a complex matrix of social fears. The man fears not being manly enough, so he dominates the women in his life. The woman fears the violence of the man, while also fearing she is not adequate as a woman if she does not have a man. She learns to be manipulative, alternately playing passive and aggressive roles. He learns to threaten and lie. It all comes out in pain and libido through a dance of sound, fury, and violence real and pretended. The fears themselves are interweavings of anger and frustration taken out in rape masked as "love," hits and punishment masked as "order," and a general insanity masked as "normal." Like a row of falling dominos it doesn't stop with just one strike, but continues on through the family, through the neighborhood, from man to man, man to woman, child to child, and child to dog”

I could not say it better and the juxtaposition is interesting

There are cultural vestiges, only that, the young Native girls becoming interested in boys still initiate negotiations which can be face saving if there is not an interest.. a small piece of a world where women, primarily, had initiated relationships and encountered little fear of abuse coming at the hands of men… it did not often happen… and would not be tolerated for long because the people there did not pretend they could not see… and Native men were possessed of a courage and knowledge that is yet much misunderstood in the civilization of Columbus who represented a different class of men, men who were absolutely amazed at the respect accorded women in the ‘new world’